School’s Out

School’s finally out for the summer! No more trudging up ten flights of stairs or listening to teachers drone on about how incompetent we are.

The last week of school was pretty typical. Our Philosophy/RS teacher decided to freak the crap out of us. He was like, “Since it’s our last day together, I’ll show you a video that helped me while I was mentally depressed. It helped me get in touch with God.” Everyone was all silent but in our minds, we were like what? Isn’t he like an atheist or something? No one said anything because he made it sound like it was serious business. So we were watching it there was this woman meditating and doing yoga. Then a few minutes into the video, one of those ghost heads pop up and there was a blood curling scream. I didn’t get my crap freaked because I wasn’t concentrating real hard on the video, I just thought it was hilarious. I don’t think anyone else was freaked out either, they were just wearing WTF expressions on their faces.

I’m not going anywhere this summer nor do I have any life changing plans. I might just stay at home and eat ice cream. It’s not as if I have anything better to do. Everyone else is probably out drinking and going clubbing. But nope, not me. I’m just going to sit on the sofa and eat Ben and Jerry’s.

I don’t know how I’m going to spend all this free time. Summer really freaks me out sometimes because I keep trying to be productive by doing something productive but when I end up not doing anything productive, I start freaking out about how I’m being unproductive so I calm myself by watching TV then the next thing you know, I’m being super unproductive.

It just never works when you force yourself to be productive. Like I could force myself to write the next Great American Novel (not that I would, seeing as I’m not American) but unless I’m suddenly inspired to do something, forcing myself to do it just ends up in disaster. It’s like forcing yourself to be creative.

Anyway I checked out the new Deathly Hallows Trailer the other day and it looks pretty amazing. I got chills all over just watching that. The only nit I have to pick is how worn out Voldemort looks. His eyes are all milky and bloodshot and his lips are really chapped. I mean, jeez man, put on some lip gloss. Don’t they have chap sticks in the wizarding world? Just because he’s some big shot dark lord doesn’t mean he shouldn’t take care of himself. After all that work retrieving Harry Potter’s blood and the bone of his father or whatever to get a new body and he ruins it with poor dental hygiene. I just think Voldemort looks kind of weird in the trailer. It’s like he grew older but how is that even possible? I’m pretty sure Voldemort isn’t going through puberty like Harry Potter and gang. And how does growing old even work in his new flesh?

On other note, vote Memorylast for SOTM? I’m pretty behind on the whole voting thing because I didn’t ask people to vote yet. I was planning on doing it when I make a new blog but I couldn’t think of anything to blog about which is why I’ve been putting it off for weeks. How I still managed to get 9 votes is beyond me but I’d appreciate it if you voted!

Mosquito Problems

I must taste really good because some psycho mosquito bit me 10 times in my sleep last night. I was in my bed, sleeping and dreaming about Sims 3 when I felt this itch on my forehead so I started scratching it but a few seconds later, my thumb started itching so I used my other hand to scratch my thumb. Soon after, my neck started itching too but I ran out of hands so I couldn’t scratch myself anymore. I was still half asleep so I just ignored it and continued dreaming about Sims 3 but something started stinging really badly. At first, I thought it was Edward Cullen biting me in my sleep since he has a tendency to watch people sleeping (I was really sleepy and my imagination is at its highest when my brain’s half dead so I think of stuff like that). But then I was like, “Hey, Edward Cullen’s a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat people.”

When I finally came to my senses, the truth dawned me: A MOSQUITO IS IN MY ROOM. I was fully awake at this point so I kicked off the covers and started screaming like I’d just seen the Boogie Monster. My dad, who had a bed head that made him look like an oompa loompa, rushed into my room and asked what was wrong. I looked him in the eye and said with the most serious voice I could muster, “There. Is. A. Mosquito. In. My. Room.” My dad looked pretty disgruntled at that and started sputtering a whole bunch of nonsense that went along the lines of, “You wake me up in the middle of the night for a stupid MOSQUITO?”

What do you mean a stupid mosquito? I’ll have you know that mosquitos aren’t stupid or harmless. You have all these people worrying about blood sucking vampires but what they should really be worrying about is blood sucking mosquitos. They like to watch you like a hawk and when you’re off guard, they fly up to you and suck your blood. If this doesn’t sound scary, I don’t know what does.

Mosquitos and insects have been a big problem lately. It’s that time of the year where it’s not cold enough for you to shut the windows but not hot enough for you to switch the air conditioning on because it’s a waste of energy as my mom likes to remind me. So I open my bedroom window when I sleep since it’s actually pretty breezy. The only problem with this is that mosquitos fly into my room while I’m asleep and eat me. Sometimes, they like to fly up to my ear and make that annoying buzzing sound that’s supposedly the sound of their wings flapping at a million times per second. I just want to scream SHUT UP ALREADY OR I’LL CLIP OFF YOUR STUPID WINGS AND YOU’LL BECOME A WINGLESS CRIPPLE.

As if the flapping wing thing isn’t annoying enough, they have bite you in the weirdest of locations. There isn’t a location that I haven’t been bitten in. They have gotten me on my nose, eyelid, earlobe, thumb, toe, bellybutton, you name it. And you know what’s the worst part? These little bastards don’t dare to show their faces. The moment you see them, they disappear. It’s like they can teleport from Point A to Point B. Forget about bats being descendants of vampires, mosquitos are the guys you’re looking for.

Also, mosquitos always seem to bite you when you least expect it, like when you’re asleep. If you’re going to bite me, at least have the guts to bite me when I’m alive and kicking. I mean, MAN IT UP, BITE ME WHERE I CAN SEE YOU. I don’t appreciate when they sneak up on me when I’m at my most vulnerable. I don’t know what’s going on in real life when I’m sleeping so I can’t pulverize the mosquito (not that I usually pulverize them, I just kind of scream and run away). But hey, at least give me a fighting chance. Anyone can bite people when they’re sleeping. There should be a mosquito code of conduct on this.

So mosquito, if you’re reading this, I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE. Come back to bite me in my sleep ever again and I’m going to scream and call my mom. Then you’ll be sorry.

The Chinese Teacher

I think my Chinese teacher needs anger management. She was on a detention-giving spree today where she gave people detention for vague crimes like ‘looking weird’ or ‘being bad’. If ‘looking weird’ or ‘being bad’ were crimes, we’d all get arrested. I mean, isn’t that what they invented the law for? To stop corrupted law enforcers from making biased judgments? I don’t think my Chinese teacher knows that because apparently, she’s still living in Imperial China where they beat people with sticks to make them confess for crimes they’ve never done.

The first detention was given to this guy who the Chinese teacher just hates for no reason. He was kind of moving his mouth so the Chinese teacher was like “WHY ARE YOU MURMURING?” and he was like, “Uh I wasn’t murmuring?”. Then she’s like “WHY ARE YOU BEING BAD? SIT OUTSIDE!”. So the guy starts packing up his stuff and putting them in his bag when she catches him putting something in his pocket so she’s like “WHAT DID YOU PUT IN YOUR POCKET?” and he’s like nothing. So she storms up to him, feels up his butt (this should count for sexual harassment) and pulls out an iPhone from his pocket. She’s really pissed at this point and starts barking, “WHY DID YOU LIE?!?!?!? FRIDAY DETENTION FOR LYING!”

Then after a few minutes of what seemed like peace, the Chinese teacher thinks that the two boys sitting in the front row are talking to each other. So she tells one of them off for provoking the other guy and sends him outside. But in reality, he wasn’t the one that was talking, it was someone else. The someone else felt bad for that guy being punished for something he did so he told the teacher that it was him who did the talking. And the Chinese teacher seemed really unsatisfied with this and started screaming, “WHY ARE YOU TELLING THE TRUTH? DO YOU THINK YOU ARE BEING BRAVE?” and the guy’s like, “I was just trying to be honest…” but before he could finish the Chinese teacher goes, “FRIDAY DETENTION FOR BEING HONEST!”